Lesson NOT Learned

Tom is going out of town for work this week and his hotel is very near a casino. Tom and I are not gamblers so our kids knew almost nothing about the topic. Last night at dinner Tom gave them a little lesson about casinos and gambling. Sometimes I think we should call Tom the Professor at the dinner table because he is an excellent teacher and when the mood is right, he will give little lessons in life as we eat dinner. Sometimes it is about silly topics and sometimes it's about more serious things, like gambling and the dangers of such activities. Last night was one of those nights and after explaining to the kids verbally what it meant to gamble and lose money, he brought out the visual aides. He got the iPad out to show them pictures of slot machines and then he took it a step further and got a free slot machine game to show them how quickly people lose money when playing the slots. We started with 75 pretend dollars and within 5 minutes the kids had each had a turn gambling away all of our "riches".

 After that, I left for a PTO meeting. At some point during my meeting I got a text from Tom: "Lesson NOT learn. We just hit the jackpot." Oops. I guess our lesson about the evils and wastefulness of spending our money on the slot machines backfired....as is the case with most gambling experiences, we should've quit while we were ahead.....and in our case, out of pretend money.

Julianna's interview about Tom

Meet My Julianna's Dad

What is Dad's name?
Tom


What does Dad do for fun?
I help him make pancakes


What does Dad do at work?
He works on the road with his friends


What is Dad's favorite thing to eat?
Everything!


What does Dad like to drink?
Milk....I mean beer! He always drinks beer every night.


How old is Dad?
He's the same old as Mommy


Where did you and Dad meet?
Still at the lake


What does Dad look like?
He looks just like his face


How much does Dad weigh?
A lot!


What makes Dad the best?
Playing hide and seek


What is your favorite thing to do with Dad?
Playing


How long have you known Dad?
For a really, really long time

romantic painting

Tom and I do not celebrate Valentine's Day like other couples. We do not do flowers and candies. This year we decided to direct our Heart Day funds into our home remodel budget. So on Valentine's Day the whole family had dinner by candlelight and I gave the kids a small gift to celebrate. (Drew and Julianna got goggles and Lily a swim cap.) After we gave them the gifts we explained to them that mom and dad were going to be painting the living room for our gift to each other. We explained that it was a lot of work to paint a living room and wasn't that a nice gift?

Last weekend Tom finished the living room painting (including two coats on the ceiling) and this week he had moved on to the kitchen. Last night he finished the kitchen and had moved the painting down the stairs and started on the family room. Tom is doing all the painting himself, as he is very particular about how perfect it needs to be. I am helping in other ways. I'm the gofer and the 'help wherever I can' person. But, to be clear, Tom has shouldered the brunt of the project, obviously.

Ok, now that you have the background of our Valentine's Day, you can fully appreciate the conversation I had with Drew this morning. Drew came down into the kitchen and looked around this morning. When he went to bed last night the kitchen was half done; and when he woke up, the kitchen was completely finished.

Drew: Geez, Mommy. You're going to have to do something really big for Valentine's!

Me: What? Why?

Drew: Because Dad has, like, painted the whole house!

I wish you could hear how flabbergasted Drew was that Tom had 'like, painted the whole house'. It is still making me laugh right now.

Memories from today

This is just a post so that I can remember the little things that were happening to us in life.

Drew was making phone calls with his play phone. He spoke with a man name Harold and another man named Larry. He was giving orders and told Larry to swab the decks. We do not know anyone by these names, and they are so out of the ordinary for a kindergartener to know, that it struck me as funny.

Julianna has been showing signs of being able to read for awhile now. She has obsessively been writing her letters whenever she has a pen and paper. Last week she wrote her first word independently. And I don't mean just writing letters I tell her to make a word. She actually sounded out a word herself and wrote it down without my help. The word was 'pan'. Since that day I have noticed that she can remember the short vowel sounds for a, e, i, and o. Yesterday I wrote about three dozen short vowel words on a piece of paper and she sounded out and read every single one of them. This seems totally crazy to me...but I'm looking forward to seeing what she figures out next.

My children are all about running lately. I went for a run first thing in the morning yesterday and when I got home they wanted to run too. They like my treadmill more than I do and Lily ended up running 1.4 miles on it yesterday. There is a running club for kids 8 and older and I'm thinking it'd be a good club for Lily to join. She needs practice making friends and the running could be a natural help for her ADHD. The other two children ran too, but not nearly as much. I'm ready for the long, warm summer days where all they do is run and play.

Tom finished up a big part of a painting project on Sunday. He has all the walls and the trim in the living room painted. The next step is to finish the second coat on the ceiling. He is currently building himself some stilts so that he can move more easily while painting so high up. I'm looking forward to getting my furniture back in the room to see how it looks. I'm being patient though -- and grateful to Tom for all his hard work. Tom is a very careful painter and I think it looks great. We have lived here almost two years and I'm so excited that we have started some of the projects that will make this house look the way we want our home to look. It's not going to be an overnight thing, but when we're done, it's going to look great. :)

Laughs, thanks to Julianna

Julianna never fails to make me laugh. Here are two things that she's said in the last 24 hours to make me smile.

I told her to get her coat on so we could leave the house. She looked on the inside and saw that her name had been written on the inside. She looks at me and says with a shocked look, "Mom! JC Penny's put my name in my coat! How did they do that?!" I then explained to her that I had put her name in her coat in case she lost it.

Tom got home from three days out of town last night after the kids went to bed. This morning Julianna and I had this conversation:
Me: Julianna, Lily's getting in the bath first. Put your jammies back on until it's your turn so you don't get cold....

Julianna crawls back into bed.

Me: Julianna! You are such your daddy's girl! You can't go back to bed!

Julianna giggles.

Me: Did you see that Daddy was home?

Julianna: Yes!

Me: How did you know?

Julianna: Because! There was a BIG BOY in your bed!!

Outtakes of the Family Photo Shoot

 



These are the outtakes from our recent family picture session. We didn't hire a fancy photographer because it was last minute, for fun, and we wanted to try out my sister, Aunt Flash's, new camera. We took the pictures at the shop of Johnson Sheet Metal, my dad's family business since 1921. It was lots of fun and we got some great shots. Julianna (I know she wants to be called Jae, but I'm going to secretly call her Julianna for as long as I can...but that's another post.) Anyway, Julianna gave us the best outtake faces. She is one expressive child!



 

 

 

This is what we did when we were told to be goofy.

My sister accidentally turned on her automatic picture feature and it took 10 or so pictures right in a row. Julianna and I decided to be goofy for all the pictures.

There could be a whole book of Julianna faces. She is possibly the most expressive person ever.

Aren't we so funny?

Someone said something hilarious.

This is Tom's favorite picture of me from the day. Don't I look cool?

I don't know where Lily learned this goofy face.

I love this picture.

I guess this is where Lily learned that goofy pose from earlier.

Oh, Julianna!

I hope we take more time to take these family pictures. They are priceless. They will look great in the next edition of my blog book. My goal is to turn each year of the blog into an actual book. I love the idea of having a collection of my writings in an actual book for my children to hold onto and read in the years to come. Actually, they aren't really allowed to read the blog yet. I'm not always sharing things on the blog that they are ready to read about. They will have to wait a few years before they can see what Mom really thought about this stuff. :)

Dancing lessons

 Tom and the kids did some dancing over the holidays. I wish I had my sister, Sarah, (whom I call Aunt Flash because she takes so many pictures everywhere she goes) with us this day. My camera and my photography skills are lacking. But I think the pictures show how much fun they were having. I'm pretty sure that I am going to have to pay for two little girls to take ballet lessons here in a couple years.

 

 

 

 

 

dinner time conversation

Julianna: I need to go to the bathroom.

Me: Julianna, you don't need to tell me that. You may ask to be excused, but I don't need to hear every time you need to go. Especially at night. You don't ever need to tell me in the middle of the night that you are going to the bathroom--just go.

Julianna: But what if I'm scared?

Me: Then you can tell me that.

Tom: Or, you don't even need to tell her. You can just come in our room and give Mommy a hug and then go back to bed. Sometimes, when I get scared, that's what I do. I just wake up, roll over, snuggle for a minute and then go back to sleep. I don't even wake her up!

Drew: So, like, what would happen if you just jumped in bed and gave Mom like a TWO HOUR SNUGGLE?!

Tom: Well.....

bookworms

I am a reader. It is possibly my favorite thing to do. I would read for a job if I could. My dream vacations involve a quiet mountain deck and a good book or a comfy beach chair, the ocean and a good book. If I run out of things to do with the kids or they are driving me crazy, I pick up a book to read to them. When we go on long car drives my children's favorite form of entertainment is a good audio book. So, yeah, obviously I love a good book and my kids know that.

Tom is not a reader. Tom thinks that books require too much work. He is not patient enough to wait for the words to reveal their story. he would rather be doing something. Building something. Fixing something. Discovering something. Tom falls asleep while reading the kids their bedtime stories. Not kidding. So, yeah, obviously it comes as no surprise that my kids know that Dad is not a reader.

So, all of your non-readers out there, the ones who think that they can teach the importance of reading by telling their kids to read and sending them to school to do it. Know this, non-reader: Your children notice. They see how you spend your time. They see what is important to you. Now, don't worry, you do not have to be a nerdy bookworm like myself to create an environment that celebrates reading. You can do so by providing opportunities for your kids to discover new books. You can do so by reading; even if what you read is the newspaper or a magazine with topics that interest you. No matter what, your kids need an example.

I realized just how important that lesson is today. Tom is reading Treasure Island right now. Well, he was reading it this weekend in Colorado. I think he started it so that he would have something to do on the train when he rode home Sunday night. Whatever the reason for picking up the book, it was important. Today, while at Target, Lily dug through a dollar bin of classic books that have been adapted to her reading level. She picked Treasure Island. She picked it because she wanted to read the same book as Daddy.

 I think that is an excellent example of just how much our children pay attention to what we do. It's another example of how reading and books help to connect people. Our children are always finding ways to connect with their parents. What better way than a good book?

a shout out

This is a shout out to my husband.

Well, actually, it's a shout out about my husband.

You guys, he did something amazing for me this weekend.

Remember I told you that I lost my good friend Gary on the 27th of December? Well, his funeral was in New Mexico. Nine and a half hours from my house.

When I received the news about Gary I hung up the phone in a little bit of shock. Tom didn't skip a beat and asked me where we were going. He started planning our trip to gather with Gary's family immediately. Even when he found out it was in New Mexico.

Due to time constraints because of three busy children, we had 48 hours to make the trip. I know that this sounds crazy....but Tom totally drove me to New Mexico anyway. We got to spend an entire day with Gary's family sharing memories, laughs and tears. At the end of the day, Tom and I started home. We left at 5 pm on Friday and arrived to pick up our children from my parents house at 2:30 pm Sunday.

In my opinion, that's a pretty amazing gift. I will be forever grateful.

PS I also should make a point to tell you that Tom could not have done this without my parents and siblings. They unselfishly stepped in to take care of our kids for the weekend so that we could go. That is also a gift that cannot be repaid. I have the best family.

just when you think you know someone

Drew went to his first football game Friday night. I know, I know. We have neglected him. Our excuses include: Tom and I don't like football and our kids go to bed around game time....so that's how our little sports fan made it to nearly five years old before attending a football game.

I thought I had Drew figured out. He loves music, drums, electric guitars and baseball. He doesn't strike me a a football kind of kid. I. Was. Wrong.

Tom took him, so I am relaying the story. Drew was very into the game. He cheered loudly (at inappropriate times every time). He studied the game. He watched intently until the end of the third quarter.

 After half time the drummers went out on the track to dance and play their drums. Tom said Grandma kept trying to point the drummers out to Drew. He was not interested. He was too busy being impressed with the football players warming up on the field. "Look! Their doing jumping jacks!!" "Look! They are throwing the ball!"

When Drew got home he told me he was cold and tired...but he was glowing with excitement. He said, "The guy on the white team had the ball and then all these blue players came and jumped on him!!" My Drew, the football fan. Who knew?

This morning on the way to school Drew and Miss Shanna were discussing the football game. Drew told her, "but the cheerleaders didn't look very good because they had sweatshirts over their pretty dresses." Miss Shanna gets the best quotes these days. A couple of weeks ago Drew was wearing a new stocking cap. He told Shanna, "My new hat is itching all of my hairs."

Just when you think you have your kid figured out, they discover something new. I can't wait to see what he'll discover next!

i promise...

...that I only forgot for a moment that it was our anniversary. I love you.

Sometimes it's a wonder I can function in the adult world. This morning this is how the conversation went:

Tom: Do you have something to tell me?

Taylor: *panic look*

Tom: Uhh...

Taylor: Ummm....I'm sorry?

Tom: Really?? That's it?

Taylor: Thank you?

Tom: Ok. So now you can never hold my forgetting against me!! What about 'happy anniversary'?!

Taylor: Oh yeah!! Duh!! HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!

Tom: Oh! It's too late!!!

Well, Tom, it only slipped my mind for a moment. I made this video for you a few months ago.

I am woman, hear me roar

I'd like to think I'm a strong, independent woman. I have liberal ideas and I take pride in making choices that women before me weren't allowed to make. I am so thankful that I live in an era where a woman can choose her path in life. I'd like to raise my girls to be strong independent women. And I'd like my son to be a respectful young man that sees his peers as his equal....male or female.

I don't think Drew got the memo.

Today when I got home from my run, Drew and Julianna were "helping" Tom work in the garage (read: playing play dough). When I went in the house to grab my breakfast, Drew turned to Tom and said, "You and me? We're workers. Mom just cleans up after us." Tom was shocked and replied, "Nooo! Mom's a worker, too!" Drew looked skeptical...."Are you sure? Really?" "Oh yeah, Mommy is a hard worker!"

There have been many instances recently that Drew has commented on such matters. He told us today that I couldn't help Tom carry a heavy object because I wasn't strong. Tom tried to argue that my strong muscles were the very reason he was asking for my help. Drew argued that there was no way that Mommy's muscles were stronger than Daddy's...and no amount of arguing with the boy could convince him.

I'm hoping such notions are a phase. I'm hoping he's just at a stage where he thinks his dad is super cool. I'm really hoping that I am not setting the example that moms, wives and women are nothing but there to "clean up after you." I hope I am more to him than a lowly maid and ass-wiper. Surely he sees that his mother works hard....oh...wait....I didn't notice what my mother did until I had to do it all myself. Maybe it's time to give this boy a few more chores.

happy father's day

Tom,

What can I say besides "thank you"?

As I went through pictures looking for some to share for this post, I was reminded of all of your hard work. If there are pictures you aren't present for, it's because you're busy at work. But what struck me is that I was there for all of the pictures snapped in our photo library. I am there everyday, able to document our children's childhoods because you are working so hard to support our entire family. If you weren't pursuing your career and being so awesome at your job, I wouldn't be getting to stay home with our children and doing what I love.

This stage of parenting is not easy. We spend a lot of time just trying to meet the needs of our kids. This leaves little time for letting loose and being silly. But, as you can see in these pictures, we are managing just fine. We are meeting needs, having laughs and making life happen everyday.

I couldn't do what I do without you. For all the desperate phone calls at 5:24 pm with sceaming, crying children in the background...there are a million more days that I am grateful that I'm here with my kids. And I couldn't do this without you. I'm not the rock star of home management that I'd like to be but it's not lost on me, or the kids, that you help take up the slack.

So, thank you. Thank you very much.

i love you. but....

We were driving to get lunch after doing our weekly grocery shopping. We had been hanging out kid-free for close to 18 hours by then. At some point in the drive Tom says to me, "If I could change just one thing about you..."

And I was thinking, "OMG! What have I done?! Did I hog the bed last night? Steal all of the covers? Oh! I know, he hates it when I wake him up in the mornings at 5:15 so I can workout....he hates me!"

And Tom continues, "Now, if it was just ONE thing....it would be...."

In my mind, "Oh god! He hates that I am always interrupting him. I know I drive him crazy with that. I try really hard to hold my thoughts inside...I know it must be annoying to live with someone that is constantly interrupting! Gahhh!"

"It would be for you to..."

To myself, "I know he hates the way I drive. Well, what can I say? I pay attention, I follow the rules. I haven't backed into anything in over a year...it was just that couple of weeks once...I just backed into two things in two weeks...but that was SO LONG AGO. How can he still be worried about my driving?!"

"... to like seafood."

"Oh...You mean it's not that I leave my dirty laundry all over the closet? Or that I don't hang your shirts up right out of the dryer?"

 "There are just so many menu options when you eat fish. Travelling is so much more fun at the ocean when you can try all sorts of new options."

You're kidding. All of my blanket stealing, messy, absent-minded procrastinating and bad driving...and he just wants me to like seafood....

"It really is delicious."

just so you know, i am wearing a strapless dress in this picture. :)

On the edge

of sanity, that is.

On January 9, 2011, Drew got sick.

On January 14, 2011, Julianna got sick. She pretty much stayed sick until yesterday. In fact, I can't remember the last day that I actually got her dressed. I just know it was a long time ago. Yesterday was the first day I had seen her smile in a very long time.

On January 17, 2011, Lily got sick. She stayed sick until Wednesday, the 19th. She went to school one day that week. Then she was well again until Tuesday the 25th. She had an ear infection and missed two days of school that week.  Monday January 31, 2011 was the last time Lily has seen the inside of her classroom. Tuesday and Wednesday were snow days. Thursday morning she woke up with a fever of 102.6 and it didn't really go down below 101 for three days. Tonight, when she went to bed, her fever, that was gone all day, was back up to 100.4. Obviously she will not be going to school tomorrow. And if the fever is still here tomorrow, Tuesday is out, too.

Lily went to school 14 days in January and zero days in February.

For me personally, this means that I have not had my normal routine for eight weeks. There have been a few glimmers...but never two days in a row. It's hard not to feel down in the dumps about this.

 I don't know what else to do to keep everyone healthy. I have a can of Lysol that I use to spray every surface all day. (I even resisted the urge to spray Lily down this morning while we cleaned up Legos. ;)) We have been washing our hands like crazy. I've been using paper towels for drying hands and other surfaces so that I don't cross-contaminate anything. I bleach out the bathtub between each bath. I have changed all the sheets on every bed and even washed bedding and pillows. More than a few times.

Besides the fact that I feel horrible when my kids are sick; and, regardless of my mental stability at the moment...what I feel the worst about is the fact that we have planned a vacation for our family during school. Yes, that's right. Lily, who has missed 7 days of school this semester (so far), is going to be missing five days in March to go to Disney World. I cannot get past the mommy guilt that I have over this fact. Tom had to work pretty hard to convince me to agree to a trip during school...but he managed. And now she's going to miss at least TWELVE DAYS in one semester.

I'm sure I will feel better about this when it is all over. I know that I will not regret the vacation with my family. I'm mean, who doesn't want to take their kids to the happiest place on Earth? But, for right now, I feel really horrible about the whole thing.

Okay. Enough already. I've got to go change the sheets on my bed again. Why? Oh, because what I didn't mention is: Tom is sick. Again. For the second time in the last eight weeks.

huntin' guys

Tom and Drew went on their first ever hunting trip together this morning. They both had a great time and I know that Tom has been looking forward to this day since the sonogram tech told us, 'It's a boy!'. haha

Last night Tom went out and got Drew his very own pair of coveralls and they bundled up this morning to hide in the bushes so they could shoot a duck. Wow! Sounds like such fun to me....

They got one bird, but Tom said that if they'd gotten their before sunrise they would have gotten a truckload of ducks. Yummy.

When they got home Drew brought the dead duck in the house to show me. I tried to keep my cool; really I did, but it was too much and I went squealing to Lily's bedroom.

Just now, as I began to type this, Drew came over and said, "Hey, hunting Mom. I'm a huntin' guy." (in a Southern accent, of course.)

I'd call their little trip to the lake a success. I hope that Drew continues to enjoy this activity with Tom. I know that experiences like this are such a cool part of raising kids and can really keep fathers and sons close. Well, I assume that it can keep fathers and daughters close, too; but I wouldn't call Lily interested in hunting...only the dead animals.

love letters

I found a two page handwritten letter from Tom today. The coolest part about the letter is that he'd written it 10 years ago. He was at KU and I was at Emporia State. We were best friends and it had never occurred to me to see him any other way. Silly, silly girl.

It's a lovely letter that talks about the weather, his homework and about how one of our friends was trying to find someone to set him up with. But, the best part is when he talks about what he's considering getting me for my birthday (two months late). Apparently he was going to get me a giant poster to hang on my wall. And since he was discussing birthday presents, he wanted to give me some ideas for what to get him for his upcoming birthday. He'd cut out a picture of a fancy Rolex watch and pasted it at the bottom of the page with the comment, "I think the bezel on this one would look particularly nice with a KU sweatshirt. Don't you?"

He and I have come a long way since then. We've been married five years this year and things just keep getting better. What he has given me over these years is way better than a poster. I'm hoping he feels the same way about me and the Rolex.

driver's ed

The other day Drew and I were going to Grandma's house via the highway. We had recently travelled that way with Tom in the car and me at the wheel. During that trip Tom couldn't help but to comment on my driving. I was driving too fast, driving in a "bad spot", merging incorrectly and coming too close to the cones. Now, fast forward to the day that it was just Drew and I in the car. This is what Drew says to me: "You almost hit those cones, Mommy! Be careful! You are going the wrong way...we are supposed to be going northeast somewhere. This is not the right way!!" So, from now on, when Tom's in the car, he will either be driving or drugged and blindfolded in the backseat.

One more funny Drew story.

Today we took a donation to the Goodwill. When we got there Drew said, "This is the Goodwill? Well, then where's the Badwill? (pointing at random buildings) Is that the Badwill? Is that?"

No, Drew, Badwill is not a place, it is something you cause when you are a backseat driver. Try and keep that to a minimum in the future.

New commitments

I don't want to just be a mommy blogger. Which is hard because I am a mommy who blogs. I love writing the stories of my life and most of them involve my children. However, with Lily getting older and starting school, I feel like her stories aren't my stories to share anymore. This whole "avoiding the mommy blogging" thing is the reason there hasn't been an update in awhile. I am struggling with which direction to take the blog, what I feel comfortable still sharing and figuring out what to talk about when my life still revolves around my children.

I do have one thing though! It's exciting and has nothing to do with children!

Recently, I made a commitment to myself. I decided that I needed to to do more for me. That might sound selfish, but as I mentioned earlier, everything revolves around my children right now. That's not always a good thing for a person's mental and emotional health, nor is it very good for the brain. So, I made a commitment to read more and watch TV less. I have recently even tried to get Tom to give up cable all together. No luck. However, even with all the options cable television offers, nothing compares to a good book. In these last few months, I have read more books than I had in the last 5 years combined. And it's been awesome.

A few months ago, I told Tom that since I was turning 30 this year, I wanted a special present. I didn't give him much direction, so he was pretty much on his own. I should also say that Tom and I don't really exchange gifts with any regularity. We live on a budget, buy what we need and that's that. It was a big deal to ask for a gift, let alone a "special" one. But, I have to say, he knocked it out of the park with this one! He got me a Kindle. If you don't know what that is, it's an electronic book that I can download books onto. 3,500 books AT ONE TIME. I cannot even explain how perfect this gift was for me. Needless to say, I am extremely happy with my birthday present!

Whew. That wasn't so hard. I can write about something other than children! I hope that you guys keep reading as I try to navigate parenting in a new stage. I am on the tail-end of babies and speeding straight towards childhood. The blogging possibilities are endless...I just have to figure out where my niche is. It will be fun discovering out who I am and how I've changed as I emerge from the baby fog.