bubble bursting

I think I might have traumatized some people with my last post--or at least I've burst some bubbles. I'm sorry! I know it's hard to hear, but Drew is in fact not always sweet as sugar. Don't worry. Drew is still the sweet, considerate, darling boy you imagine him to be. Just like Lily is the creative, helpful, independent, darling girl you imagine her to be. And Julianna is the sweet, funny, friendly, darling girl you imagine her to be. It's just that everybody, everywhere, has a side that isn't so darling.

Last night Drew was so tired. He had spent all day working very hard at being perfect for his teachers, working his eyes overtime to keep up, and it was the exhausting first day back at school after a full two weeks off from school. He was allowed to be grumpy. He was allowed to say things he didn't mean. He was allowed to be the bear that I know him to be sometimes. Now, just because he was allowed to be a pistol doesn't mean he didn't have consequences. But part of being safe at home is being allowed to test your outer limits. I love having a home where people are allowed to be totally, utterly, unedited. It's not always fun; it's hardly ever easy; but at least everyone at our house knows that they are loved no matter what. Lord knows there are days when I say things I don't mean, or I yell a little too loudly at my kids, or I lose my patience. It's nice to have a relationship with my children where we are allowed to make mistakes, share our feelings, and love each other through it all.

I'm pretty sure that no matter what Tom and I do, our children will grow up and find the mistakes we made. I hope that by having an open and honest relationship with them, it will provide them with a little peace about it. They are bound to think we did something wrong....but if they've spent their whole lives being allowed to be honest about how they are feeling, then I doubt the will hold back their feelings as adults. Hopefully that openness will give Tom and I a chance to give our excuses for our parenting mishaps and save our children a few dollars in therapy.