More than words

Dear Lily,

Let me start by saying you are just absolutely amazing just as you are.

I know I could say this thousands of times to you and you will only hear it once or twice, but without a doubt you are a smart, creative, beautiful, darling girl.

We have entered a new stage in your life. I didn't know that it would start so early and I know I will never feel ready for it. But it's here and we must do our best to meet your needs, say the correct words, and love you just the right way. We have to. You are about to have some possible life defining  moments in your life.

Yesterday at dinner you shared that a boy pushed you and told you that you are ugly. This broke my heart and yours. I don't know if I responded to you in the best way when you shared this. I hope I did. There is a fine line between empowering your child and building them up, and making your child see themselves as the victim. I hope that I was able to lessen the strength of this boy's words and strengthen your armor against unkindness.

I know that I can say you are beautiful, and you are, but beautiful is not the most important thing. The most important thing about this moment is to remember how this felt. Remember that words have power. Power to show love and kindness; and power to show hate and unhappiness. The words we speak toward others and the actions we take, the way we make others feel; it's all important.

You are strong. This is not the last time someone will try and hurt you. But you can learn from this moment. You can learn that you have strength beyond your years. You can learn that your strength doesn't come from me, or your dad, or from what others say or how they feel about you. Your strength came from inside yourself. No matter what happens you, you must build the strength within yourself from your own power. You are in charge of you.

There are going to be lots of people in your life that try to make you feel bad. You are too amazing for that not to happen. It's not going to be easy, and it will hurt every time, but you are not a victim. Let these moments in your life remind you of your strength. Use these moments in your life to have compassion for unhappy people. Right now you are only seven years old and you know yourself better than most adults. You know deep down how awesome you are. You are too powerful to let a mean, powerless bully take even an ounce of your strength.

I love you more than words can say.

Love,
Mom