Thursday, April 21, 2011

FYI, darling Stivers children

***Notice***

Your parents will no longer be on duty between the hours of 10pm to 7am.We will be on-call for emergency situations only.

Emergencies include (but are not limited to):
  • medical trauma (ie. a broken bone, a collapsed lung, vomiting that doesn't reach the trash can or toilet)
  • a nightmare that could cause future psychological damage
  • something is on fire
  • there is an intruder in our home (intruder means bad guy)
  • blood coming from your body that cannot be stopped by pressing firmly with a tissue (this does not include situations that you have squeezed your tiny cut to the point of blood. this refers only to blood that starts on it own and will not stop on its own, with a reasonable amount of pressure.)
Non-emergency situations, at this time, should be handled independently. If you are unclear how to deal with a certain situation, but it does not fall under the "emergency" category, than you should wait until morning to discuss it with a grown-up at that time. Your parents should not be bothered with non-emergency situations anytime between the hours of 10pm and 7am. Period.

Non-emergency situations include (but are not limited to):
  • needing to use the bathroom for typical purposes (ie going potty or poop)(this rule does not apply to Julianna until she has reached 3 years old and is using a big girl bed)
  • needing your blankets re-adjusted
  • needing a drink of water or something to eat
  • you've lost a stuffed animal or toy
  • you need a band aid for your hangnail
There is one non-emergency that you may speak to us about during the night. If you are in need of a hug, kiss or short snuggle, than you may wake us. However, it cannot last more than 3-5 minutes and we will not be escorting you back to your bed. We will no longer be leaving our bed for non-emergency situations.

We appreciate your attention to this notice. You should know that we are taking this notice  extremely seriously. Violators of these rules may be subject to harsh punishments - including having to sleep outside.

Thank you for your time.

Sleep well, children,

Mom and Dad

3 comments:

Liz said...

You're so funny! This is great!! I wish it would work! Happy Easter!

Unknown said...

You must have a camera hidden in our house. How else could you know the things we have been struggling with.

Mary said...

Like and double like!!!